How stupid can people be - Part Two

I have done a few blogs about Manuka honey and one last year was about it being sold for £83 a jar and in which I suggested that some people are amazingly gullible.

Recently Keith from The Little Smokehouse who also does the Bromham Mill Market, showed me something from a Thomas Cooke In-flight magazine.

On the face of it [excuse the pun] this looks like a wonder product.
According to the blurb it is

A legendary cream that takes multi purpose to the next level. Egyptian Magic is an all natural skin cream that can tame your hair frizz, eradicate dry skin, smooth and sooth chapped lips, moisturise your face or use as a make up primer - the list is endless

Just what the world needs I thought, an end to one of the greatest problems facing society today - hair frizz. I imagined Hair Frizz clinics all over the country being  closed down and fully qualified Hair Frizz Technicians queuing outside the Job Centre.
It also explains how Elizabeth Taylor and other Egyptians managed to have such frizz free hair.

Before Egyptian Magic

After Egyptian Magic

Any thing that takes multipurpose to the next level does it for me, so I had a hunt round and found its possible to pay even more than £20, you can buy it from Boots for £29 for 2 oz

Although Keith was a bit enraged by the price, initially I was interested that it contained pollen.
Apparently the ingredients are:-

Egyptian Magic is made of Honey, Beeswax, Olive Oil, Royal Jelly, bee pollen & Bee Propolis.

I sell propolis cream that contains honey, beeswax, olive oil and propolis but lacks pollen and Royal jelly.
To sell a cosmetic in the UK it has to be licenced and included in the process is an laboratory analysis of the product.
When I submitted my recipe, which contained pollen, I was told

Hello MartinThanks for your email.The pollen would not be permitted I am afraid, as it is an allergen.

I have done a course on allergens and knew that there were 14 allergens.
And that pollen isn't one of them.
However I had been dreading the cost and time involved in the process of getting the cream approved, so couldn't be bothered to argue and took it out and got it approved.
Approved cosmetics have to maintain certain records about the product so I contacted Egyptian Magic about its contents.
I received an email saying:-

Yes, your statement is true and we are the only company in the EU that is complying with Regulation (EC) 1223/2009 regarding labeling of cosmetics, and of course all the mandatory testing made for the products to be sold in the EU..For any inquires, please contact our RP (Responsible Person): at .......

I was a little surprised to see Egyptian Magic  'are the only company in the EU that is complying with Regulation (EC) 1223/2009 regarding labeling of cosmetics    but wrote a letter to their office in Belgium
The day after I received the email I got another email saying

I am in contact with them and our internal responsible person. They will not provide this information to you.

They have ignored any further emails.

The Egyptian Magic web site is a treasure trove of deranged, quasi religious fervour only the Americans can produce.
My favourite bit is about the history of Egyptian Magic

The Story of Egyptian Magic begins in 1986 at a Chicago Diner when an elderly man approached Westley Howard (The name Mr. ImHotepAmonRa was then known as), who was passing through as a water filter salesman at that time. The elderly man said to Westley, “Brother, the Spirit has moved me to reveal something to you.”. In that moment, Mr.ImHotepAmonRa said, ”It didn’t seem too weird to me. I’m a Spiritual person, so these things happen to me all the time.”
The stranger´s name was Dr. Imas. He never revealed his last name or made it clear what kind of doctor he was. Over the next two years, Dr. Imas periodically visited Mr. Howard in Washington and showed him how to make a skin cream from olive oil, beeswax, bee pollen, royal jelly and bee propolis (a substance that seals hives).
Dr. Imas claimed it was the exact formula for a cream found in ancient Egyptian tombs.

An article in the New York Times suggests Howard, sorry, Mr ImHotepAmonRa, is probably quite mad but has managed to transfer his skills in selling water filters to selling snake oil, sorry, a miracle cream.
The article also quotes a researcher in Egyptian cosmetics from the UK as saying Egyptians didn't have the ability to separate out pollen, propolis and royal jelly. 
Also propolis is highly insoluble and can only be reduced to a liquid by soaking it in 90%+ proof alcohol. Apparently Egyptian brewers only managed beers of 3-4%

Although not shown on the tub, the web site claims another ingredient to be 'Divine Love'. Essential to get a flawless complexion and makes short work of hair frizz. Unfortunately I have been unable to find a local source for my cream.

Recently I was in Tesco's when an elderly man appeared from the Ready Meals aisle.
'It didn’t seem too weird to me. I’m a Spiritual person, so these things happen to me all the time' I thought, ' especially in Tesco's'
 'Hello geezer' he said. 'My names Professor Connor Mugg and I've been sent by the Spirit MakaKwikBuk to guide you on the path to cash in on the gullible. I'm an acquaintance of Westley Howard, sorry, Mr ImhotepAmonra'.

A few things to think about. Firstly you've got to charge a lot more. A lot more. It doesn't matter what it costs to make just make it expensive. That way when the punter buys it they convince themselves they are buying something special and they are treating themselves. Gullibility, vanity and self indulgence are critical to flog this kind of stuff. If a miracle cream costs 50p a gallon nobody would be interested. Make it £50 an ounce and they won't be able to get enough. The Spirit MakaKwikBuk  calls it the Manuka Principle.

Second, you've got to sort your marketing out. Make lots of vague promises about what it can do, Not dull things like 'keeps your drains clear' but something along the lines of 'can transform the most hideous orc into a vision of loveliness'. Get as much New Age hippy mumbo jumbo in the advertising as you can. Use words like 'pure', 'naturally sourced',  'organic' 'holistic', 'natural', 'pamper', 'energising', 'purifying',' enriched', Use pictures of skinny blonde women running through fields, no not Theresa May, or photoshopped women with perfect complexions for the punters to aspire to.

Its a good idea to try and link to something 'mystical' or 'spiritual', the punters love that sort of thing, its a big market.

Also, think of a strap line. Something that plays to peoples vanity and self indulgence. I suggested to L'Oreal Paris they used 'Because you're worth it' Try something like that, perhaps 'Because you can afford it or think you can'

With that he disappeared into the Home Bakery aisle never to be seen again.
'Well you can't say pharaoh than that' I thought to myself.

I immediately convened a meeting of the Executive Directors of North Bedfordshire and after an intensive session of storming brains, picking low hanging fruit, clear sky thinking, running things up flag poles and seeing who saluted them, and lots of actioning joined up thinking at this moment in time, we came up with the following.

We will be in future charging a stupid amount of money for the cream.This will obviously take punters spirituality to a new level as well as our bank balance.
We will be providing finance arrangements through Wonga to pay for it. Terms and Conditions will apply.

It will be re-branded as Znaykeoyul cream.We will trace its history to the exact recipe used by the possibly fictional Bownhed tribe of Bedfordshire. Ethereal mystics who all had fantastic complexions, displayed none of the seven signs of ageing and had eye lashes to die for.

As for the things it can do, as Egyptian Magic would say 'the list is endless'  so to save having to write an endless list of things it can do, we can leave that to the punter's imagination. It'll probably be very good for hair frizz.

Extracting the honey

And finally we are ready to extract the honey.
Following up the previous blog, when I returned to the frames they were clear of bees,

The extraction can be a messy business and I do it in the kitchen.
Click here to see the video


So at last order is restored to the Universe and I have some honey for markets.
As I said in the earlier blog I was a bit irritated with myself for becoming a honey producer rather than a bee keeper, worrying about having honey to do the markets. I cancelled three markets and I'm now not bothered about it at all.
From now on in I will do the monthly Bromham market, the Potton quarterly market, the annual events at Kempston, the Open Farm Day, the Beds Young farmers Rally and possibly a few one offs.

With this blog, I often start one and come back to it from time to time and I have about a dozen in various stages of completion.
Worrying about honey, doing the whole horrible extraction thing and having to look forward to a lengthy process of bottling the honey and labelling them reminds me again of my disinterest in honey.
One of my uncompleted blogs is title 'Bee keeping without honey'. I must finish it.

The truth about bee deaths. Possibly

Recently I met someone at Bromham Mill market and we discussed the plight of bees. Apparently there had been something on television/wireless about insecticides and I assume this meant neonicitinoids [hereinafter referred to as neonics].
I said the problem I had was that I thought science to be hopelessly corrupt on this issue The big conglomerates can produce their own scientific 'evidence' to prove they are not dangerous as easily as Friends of The Earth, Greenpeace can produce 'evidence' to prove they are.
'Yes, but we know the truth' he said, rather conspiratorially..
Well, no we don't. I'm not a scientist and I'm pretty sure he isn't either. We haven't studied for years, passed exams,devised scientific investigations, be able to interpret complicated scientific reports to produce a conclusion, if there is one.
It seemed a bit like saying, 'Yes I know some scientists say E = mc² but we know its  E = mc³

We seem to adopt positions for no obvious logical reason and then surround ourselves with 'proof' we are right. Anything else is 'fake news'

Recently the UK Centre for Ecology and Hydrology produced yet another investigation into the effects of neonics on bees
When other reports have been produced implicating neonics in bee deaths, the standard response of Syngenta and Bayer, the producers of the neonics, is that the reports are not conslusive as they do not recreate field conditions  and are too small in size to be accurate. They know quite well universities and research centres do not have the financial backing to do anything of any size.
On the face of it the CEH report overcomes this and covers bees in the UK, Germany and Hungary. Sounds good but it was only 2000 hectares.

Leaving aside the results and their interpretation, the first thing that struck me was that the research was funded by Syngenta and Bayer, the companies who produce the neonics. It only cost them £3m and was voluntary. Quite why they would do this is not clear. Either they were sure they would get the result they wanted or they are stupid. As sales of thiamethoxam are worth $1.1bn to Syngenta I would have thought it could be an expensive mistake.
They had funded something similar in America in 2014 with results that focused on the apparent benefits to the agriculture industry

Secondly the report only covers two of the the three neonics banned in the EU. The three neonics banned are thiamethoxam, clothianidin and imidacioprid yet imidacioprid isn't included. Is it safe? - if so why is it banned, if not why wasn't it included.?

Rather than wade through all the various 'pros' and 'cons' articles I just looked at the CEH web site.

The researchers found that exposure to treated crops reduced overwintering success of honeybee colonies – a key measure of year-to-year viability – in two of the three countries. In Hungary, colony number fell by 24 percent in the following spring. In the UK, honeybee colony survival was generally very low, but lowest where bees fed on clothianidin-treated oilseed rape in the previous year.No harmful effects on overwintering honeybees were found in Germany.

They went on to say

According to the CEH lead author, Dr Ben Woodcock, "The neonicotinoids investigated caused a reduced capacity for all three bee species to establish new populations in the following year, at least in the UK and Hungary."

So, not a universal result. It seems a little odd to say neonics caused an effect in all three groups..... except Germany. Why not say effects were found in two of the three countries.

They think the reason for the variation in results is due to the fact that German bees are 'healthier' than UK and Hungarian bees and have access to a wider range of wild flowers to feed on.
So given that German bees were OK, does this mean if British and Hungarian bees had access to more forage and were healthier [however that is measured], they also would not have been affected and then all three countries would have have seen no effect?
Almost inevitably the report finishes off the the standard Scientists Lament

In Dr Woodcock’s view, "There may be opportunities to mitigate negative impacts of neonicotinoid exposure on bees through improved honeybee husbandry or availability of flowering plants for bees to feed on across non-cropped areas of the farmed landscape. Both these issues require further research.

Yes folks more research.

So, what has been made of this report?
On one side we have the Corporate Bee Killers. Peter Campbell from Syngenta said'

The negative and positive results reported by CEH could easily be random, ie not real.” He said even taking the results at face value “demonstrates that neonics can be used safely or even with benefit to bees under certain circumstances, such as reported in Germany.”

The National Farmers Union:-

We strongly believe that policy decisions – such as restricting the use of neonicotinoids – must be based on sound science which gives strong evidence. And while this CEH study provides more useful information, we still don’t have that definitive evidence for the impact of neonicotinoids.”

Bayer Crop Science said

The CEH did not find consistent effects across Germany, Hungary and the UK on key indicators of honeybee health such as colony strength, forager morality, overwintering success of the colonies, behaviour or disease susceptibility in honeybees.' Colony death rates in the UK were generally too high to support robust scientific conclusions.

And the paid lobbyists for the companies wade in.

Surprisingly the Eco Hippies thought differently and the Guardian had no doubts.

Greenpeace got their lentils in a lather claiming on their Energydesk site

Scientists have found for the first time that neonicotinoid pesticides can harm honey bees in the real world.

They somehow forgot to mention the German bees
Their chief scientist said

“This major study marks a watershed moment in the fight to protect our bees [and] fills a crucial gap in our scientific understanding, The case for a permanent ban on these pesticides is now unassailable, and our politicians will have to take action.”

Buglife came up with much the same and Friends of the Earth were silent although one of their campaigners said.

This crucial study confirms that neonicotinoid pesticides come with a nasty sting in the tail for our under-pressure bees. It's time for a complete and permanent ban on these chemicals.

'Sting in the tail - geddit? Hilarious.

To be honest I'm a bit bored by the endless Scientific Top Trumps and I've decided to ignore the to'ing and fro'ing of this for the time being. As Peter said in 'The Thick of It'' I'm bored with this I'm going for a Twix

In other news, do you know what these two are?

The one on the left is a British Black Bee. These are our true native honey bee that was virtually wiped out over 100 years ago. However a few colonies still exist in parts of Wales, Ireland and Scotland.
On the right is a wasp.
If you couldn't tell them apart don't worry neither can the pest control officers of Angelsey County Council.
They were called to a swarm and decided they were dealing with wasps so killed them all. 15,000 of them apparently but I wonder who counted them.
Problem was they weren't wasps, they were honey bees. Rare British Black Bees.
In fairness to the Pest Control Officers its extremely difficult to tell them apart.

• The British Black Bee is black whereas the wasp is black and bright yellow.
• Bees are furry whereas wasps have a hard exo skeleton.
• Bees swarm wasps don't. 
• Bees legs are flat whereas wasps are round
• Wasps fold their wings longitudinally, bees don't

These trivial, obscure facts are hardly the sort of thing Council PCO's are likely to be taught unlike the fact that they can't charge for dealing with honey bees but can do so for getting rid of  wasps.

Still not to worry, an Angelsey spokesman said 

It appears that our usual procedure was not followed in this instance, and we will therefore be investigating the matter further

I emailed Angelsey asking if they  would publish the results of their investigation.
Didn't get a reply. Probably busy working on the investigation.

Killer Bees

I've mentioned before the rubbish the UK hack press produce about bees and swarming as 'clickbait' and from time to time they make reference to 'Killer Bees' and the most disgusting example came from the Star, who for some reason describes itself as a newspaper rather than an emergency Andrex substitute.

There is no doubt that people can die from 'bee' stings but this needs to be given a bit of perspective. In 2010 Government statistics reported that  'five people suffered fatal contact with hornets, wasps and bees”, without being able to say which species accounted for how many.

The same report also said:-

- 35 people were killed in bathtubs

-  four women were killed by “ignition or melting of nightwear”

- thirteen died accidentally after falling off a cliff.

Equally there's no doubt that bee stings are painful but it takes over 1000 stings to kill a normal healthy adult [which therefore excludes a Star reporter].

Honey bees are not aggressive and only sting if they or the hive is under threat.

However there are bees that push this to the limits and in America there are what have become known as Africanised bees or Killer Bees.

Its a general true-ism in bee keeping that the more defensive the bee, the more honey they produce.

I had a colony I called the Bedford Bastards that produced more honey than any colony I have had. Problem was they were very defensive. VERY defensive, and on one unforgettable day they had a real go at me. It was a very humid day and they started to be defensive as soon as they saw me. Rather than just fly about me as the other bees did, all I could hear was the 'whack' as they attacked me. They followed me back to the house [150 yds away] and wouldn't go away. Normally they leave me alone after a few yards.
I couldn't get back in the house as they wouldn't leave me alone and I finished up walking across two fields and then in a big loop through the village to try and lose them and get home. As bees are clones of the queen, their temperament is the temperament of the queen.

I don't have her anymore.

In the 1950's the Brazilian Government undertook a program to try and increase the productivity of their bees to provide pollination resources to support their growing agriculture industry. The native, European based bee, wasn't really suited for hot climates so they employed an award winning Brazilian biologist called Warrick Kerr to come up with a solution.

In view of what happened its perhaps a shame he wasn't called Wayne.

African bees are notoriously defensive but also produce large quantities of honey and Kerr brought 26 queens from Tanganyika to start a breeding programme in a 'secret' research facility near Sao Paulo.

Here things descend into a cheap Hollywood horror flick.

Apart from when they swarm, queens do not leave the colony but because of the risks involved, the Brazilian hives had some sort of queen excluder on their entrances to keep the queen and drones inside.
According to Kerr what happened next was that a friendly local bee keeper came across the hives, saw the queen excluders and wanted to help so removed them. Ooops.

So, a local beek wandered into a secret research facility unchallenged and then took it on himself to remove dozens of queen excluders. Really??????????

Anyway the bees escaped and started spreading across the country. The African drones are stronger and fly faster than the native drones so the genetics of the African bee were introduced into the native bees and Africanised Bees were born.

Due to the nature of the bees they spread quickly and arrived in America in 1985 and have reached California. Their progress north is limited by their tolerance of cold weather but have continued to spread through South America. Ironically they are killing off unique strains of stingless bees that were the subject of research by .........Warrick Kerr.

As the bees spread through North America headlines like these became more common and the Killer Bees legend was born.

Perhaps surprisingly AB's are smaller than their European cousins and their venom is the same. What makes them different is their easily provoked and extreme defensive reactions.

Some of their characteristics are:-

 - can create colonies in a wider range of environments than European bees.

 - swarm far more often than European bees increasing the rate at which they spread and the number of colonies. If stressed the whole colony can abscond.

 - react much more violently to changes in colour and sound. There are regular stories of the bees being provoked by the sound of lawnmowers or cars backfiring.

 - react to intrusions 50 ft away.

 - can chase you for up to a quarter of a mile.

 - their attack pheromone is far more potent than the European bees so you attract more bees if you upset them.

The bees have produced something of a dilemma for American bee keepers. On one hand they are very difficult to manage yet on the other hand they produce a lot of honey. However the reality is they are here to stay and there's nothing can be done about them.

To Kerr's credit his programme was a success in that the Brazilian output of honey went from 47th in the world to 7th but this is something of a pyrrhic victory.
As the problem spread he received a lot of personal attacks from the Brazilian press accusing him of incompetence and introducing a Frankenstein alien species. A lot of this may have been because he was an outspoken critic of the Brazilian military governments civil rights record.
The Africanised bees are hardly a 'new' species and are cousins of the indigenous bees in Brazil.
Honey bees in North America are not a native species and were introduced by the Europeans. Apparently native Indians called them the 'white man's fly'.

So could they be introduced here? Could some nutter smuggle in some African bees and let them loose? However disappointing to the Star it may be, probably not. The weather in this country is too cold for them so we will have to do with threats from Asian Hornets.
Or 'Horror Hornets' as the Star will probably call them.